This
must have been my fifth or sixth visit to Nepal. Yet there was some excitement.
I reached Mumbai airport. The excitement was about seeing the new Mumbai
airport. The new terminal had just been opened. Only two days before. T2 as it
is called. The terminal is exceptionally well designed. Very elegant. I checked
in. Not much crowd there. Cleared immigration. The lounge is beautiful. I went
to Costa Coffee. I am not much of a Starbucks Coffee man – I have stuck loyally
to Costa Coffee. Fortunately it has an outlet in Korum Mall which is very close
to my residence.
‘Coffee
– One Americano please.’
‘No,
we do not have coffee!’
I was speechless. What the heck? I mean do you ever
expect that answer from Costa Coffee? What if Pizza Hut tells you ‘Sorry, we do
not have Pizza, you can order anything
else?’ I knew that Shettys have stopped
selling dosas, idlis and filter coffee too – they are in to dance bar these
days. Has Costa Coffee also decided to open…… No, no. Something must be wrong.
I asked him the same question – that begot the same answer. There was no
alternative but to move to ‘Vaango,’ the authentic South Indian experience.
‘Vanakkam’
said the man on the counter. For some reason which I am unable to understand,
South Indians think I am also a tamilian. Not just them, many others too.
The
name Patwardhan sounds like Pattabhiraman. My only defence is that I can speak
very good Marathi – unlike Mumbai based Maharashtrians. So if Raj or Uddhav
declare a war on the South Indians again, having exhausted their choices, I can
escape by speaking Marathi. But we are digressing. I was at Vaango!
‘Vada-Idli’
I ordered. ‘Idli Vada’ the man on the counter shouted the order to the boy who
was busy preparing various orders. Yes Idli-Vada. That’s the South Indian way. You
say ‘Vada-Idli’ and declare that you are not Pattabhiraman but you are actually
Patwardhan. Marathi Manoos! Saying Vada-Idli is like calling a car
Benz-Mercedes. Or Royce Rolls. Not done. The order is important. You can’t
ignore it.
I
then asked for coffee. ‘Make it strong. Filter Coffee I mean.’ I said as I
handed over some money.
‘Coffee?’
‘Saari sir, no coffee!’
There
it is, yet again! I guessed coffee beans were in short supply and that the
production of coffee beans must have been affected by inclement weather or El
Nino. I could foresee what was coming up – there would be demonstrations
against coffee prices, Sharad Pawar would intervene; I mean everybody knows
these steps. But there was a surprise.
‘Why
no coffee?’ I asked him.
‘Saar,
we are still starting!’
‘What
does that mean?’
‘No water supply.’
‘Really?’
‘No
Saar.’
‘So
No coffee!’
‘No
coffee, Saar.’
I
walked quietly to the lift, I moved one level lower to Gate 85. And Oh, wonder
of wonders! There was a Costa Coffee counter and it was serving coffee!
As
in our Housing Society, the lower floor gets water first! Ha, ha!! Elementary,
Dr Watson!!!
Vivek